“Bobby, you picked a great one.”

Exactly ten years ago today on a cold and bitter February night in NYC I made the wisest decision of my life: I asked Rachel McDonald to marry me. Thankfully she said yes.

The story of my engagement to Rachel actually started with a ruse (a supposed dinner plans we had with the Pontaerlli’s that night). Instead of dinner I called Rachel at 5pm that Friday night, in 2001, and said “we have a change in plans…can you meet me at The Empire State Building” (for those who take me for an overly romantic guy, I still have yet to see “An Affair to Remember”).

Thankfully, Rachel avoided getting hit by a cab and met me (on time I might add) in the front of the most majestic building in NYC. I knew by the look on her face it was both clear to her what my intension were and what her answer would be. While we took the elevator ride up 102 flights to the observation deck, we chatted briskly about the important issues of the day, like the weather and how the SU basketball team where doing. However, through it all, it was all too clear what was going to happen (I mean in was a cold Feb. night, why would anybody want to go to the top of the Empire State Building). Once at the top we took in the scenic view, then I went to a knee and proposed. Called it the emotions of the moment or maybe because it was zero degrees that night, but once Rachel said “yes” we were quickly on our way back down. We had after all, plans that night. I had a rental car awaiting us (we still lived in the city) and we were on our way, first a stop to my Parents home in Scarsdale, and then onto Rachel's parents in Westport were a feast of Lobster and New England clam chowder awaited us. On the way to the car were we both overwhelmed by the events, it was hard to even think straight. I did however know one thing, and that was I knew exactly who had to call first to tell of the great news. My best man Dave would have to wait, the boys from Edgewood same thing. In fact when we got in the car Rachel had at the ready her cell phone, the size of a small sandwich (it was ten years ago) and was all ready to start the endless calls to the “tribe” of a family that she is apart of. But before she started to dial I said let me make one call, the first call…to my sister Maria. Rachel gladly passed the phone to me.

Ten years later I still remember Maria's number. Soon after dialing 505-8467, Maria pick-up the phone, and after we dismissed with some pleasantries (like how the SU basketball team was doing) I told her the big news- Rachel and I just got engaged. Without hesitation and with a small crack in her voice she something I will never forget:

“Bobby, you picked a great one”

Her response was not surprising. Not so much because of what I had shared with her about my feelings for Rachel, but because her reaction was based primarily on her first hand experience with my future wife. You see, simply put Maria ADORED Rachel. Whether it was dinner at a trendy east village restaurant, to watching and analyzing the Sopranos on HBO, to waiting in line to see the newest Matrix film or a simple call to her to help us solve the NYT crossword puzzle (she knew everything), Maria loved everything about Rachel and cherished every opportunity to be with her. And the feeling was mutual. While both Rachel and I could never really understand what exactly Maria did at her job (assessing the value of engineering firms around the world was the best we could figure out) it was the vast range of interest and passions that Maria had that Rachel found so endearing. And Maria was no snob. She could happily discuss the classic and current events as much as get a chuckle watching a rerun of the Odd Couple. Because of this relationship, Rachel was the loving sister Maria never had, someone who treated her as she truly was, a kind, smart and fun person, with no agenda or conditions.

But what was fascinating to Maria to no end was not only the grace, charm and beauty that Rachel possess, but it was her loving and devoted way she talked about her family, that "McDonald tribe" that Maria would call it. It seemed to Maria to be an endless parade of stories, centered on fascinating, passionate people, all interesting in their own special way but ALWAYS undeniable connect by a single bond of family or friendship. She had heard all the stories, images, characters that enrich Rachel life and she would many times privately and affectionaly reactant them to me. Among her favorites: Rachel’s beautiful Mom teaching aerobics, her father chasing the neighborhood kids and making crazy bets, the night Rachel's parents meet the Pasagian's, summers at Lincoln Park, the day the local Rabbi saw a Christmas Tree at the home of her mom when she was young, John and Maureen and their endless love of the theater, Jake and Johnny Cash, Willie sending a bottle of Champagne to Marvin Hagglers’ table, Juddy sinking clutch free throws for Durfee as a HS sophomore, playing endless games of BB at the Feitelbergs backyard, EVERYDAY working for cousin Joanne’s catering company, Auntie Nancy and all her fairies!, Nicky Salmon and his sandwiches, her vivid details of her high ceiling always welcoming home on Underwood, all 7 Hills, Weasie and Rick and their VW van they had in the 70’s, Meat Pies…lots of Meat pies, Grinders (from Mazzulllis), the Venus De Milo, Bakers Beach, people named Cuffy, Tough Tony and Togo, Uncle Andy and the '48 team, cousin B.J. and the '79 team, cousin Bobby and the '84 team, Juddy and the 88-89' team. Uncle Barry's love of the Irish, Uncle Bob and the FBI and of course her beloved Granny's who would scratch her back at night and who always rooted for her beloved Red Sox.

You see at this point even thought I dated Rachel for over three years, Maria had yet to meet any of her family. So when we came back from Mass, the weekend we got engaged (we celebrated that Sunday night at Willie and Izabel's apartment with Maria) and the plans for a June wedding were just starting to develop, and with it the long procession of party, dates and family get together I wondered if it all might be overwhelming for Maria. As those who knew her, she had a hard time allowing anyone to enter her world. It would be something she battled her whole adult life. So the prospects of literally overnight being engulfed by the “tribe” was potentially intimidating to her. But Maria felt no fear. After all if the McDonalds were anything like Rachel, she would undoubtedly love them all. And she did.

Our engagement stared that ground hog day in 2001 and 105 days later Rachel and I would marry. In between Maria was in the center of it all. From wedding gown shopping in NYC with Joanne and Colleen (Colleen commented on how “cool" and "New York" Maria and my Mom where) to getting the material for her “wedding party” dress, to the bachelorette party where she declared to everyone “that I was a lucky Bastard”.

And to NEVER, be overlooked is the other side of Rachel’s family, the Woltman’s. Smaller in size but equally generous in spirit, both Maria and my Mom experienced this first had during the weekend of Rachel’s bridals shower (One of only two trips to Fall River Maria ever made). That weekend Rachel's Uncle Lee and Aunt LeAnn literally open their doors by inviting them both to stay at their newly renovated home in Westport for the weekend. The cherry on top, and a great way to illustration how these families roll together, was the Sunday morning that weekend when both my Mom and Maria were awaken by a knock at the door. It was cousin Brendan McDonald, who's company was doing the construction of the home, who came by the house and the three shared a impromptu cup of coffee before Brandon went make to do his work (Which made my Mom comment that every family should have a Brendan McDonald).

In retrospect it all seemed like a fast sprint. From the Top of the Empire State Building (FYI, Maria was always partial to the Chrysler building) all the ways to that fun filled and very rainy afternoon in Newport. In-between Maria was exposed to an amazing group of people she quickly called and was accepted as family.

Sadly, she spent so few years as member of this tribe, but she cherished the feeling of being accepted, an acceptance from EVERYONE she met.

Ten years ago tonight…how Maria was right…I picked a great one. In many ways she did too.